Hackneyed squabbles occurred as of late due to carnal relationships between two strange bed fellows; a parson and a stripper.

The facts of this case are in no way terse, as bulk of it is an uncorroborated accusation from a disputant of questionable credibility, while the rest is constituted of demurrals from an accused with nothing to lose but his reputation. In Summary;
The peeler claims that sometime in 2015, she entered into intimate relationship with the pastor in need of more sons, who after numerous amounts of intercourse and cash giftings (supposedly more than ‘£8,000 in two weeks’), prognosticated marriage. She claims she believed the pastor to be divorced and that in one of their drinking sections, the preacher administered poison to her which caused her to haemorrhage all through a year. This happened shortly after she informed her lover that she was with child. She claims that the Muslim born pastor is a fraud who engages in carnal knowledge with numerous women including an unnamed Nigerian actress, whose face she remembers. In one of her more detailed accusations she opined that the clergyman draws spiritual sustenance from his bizarre sexually activities and that he is capable of performing even while asleep. For some reason, the Canada based exotic dancer still wanted the preacher to honour his marriage proposal. The peeler adduced evidence of nude photographs to support her claims. She was however arrested following an investigation by the police, for blackmail and possible terrorist affiliations; a crime against the state. She has been granted bail, and is to be represented by a team of lawyers led by a renowned human right activist, and is demanding N500 million in damages.


The parson vehemently rejects these claims, averring that the ‘prostitute’ was a troubled lady who alleged that she was touched by his sermons and that taking a new leave by quitting her job would prove to be a financial strain on her. The clergyman claims that after due consultation with his spouse, he gave her money of what amounts to N1.4 Million. His claim is simple. He insists that he was blackmailed and that the blackmail is not unconnected with attempts by powers that be to punish him against his positive stand on the killing of Christians. The police are apparently on his side as investigations on a lead proved to incriminate the stripper. Recent confession from another woman on the street suggest that the preacher was set up and and that the stripper in question was simply a replacement for the blackmail job.

The available facts are greatly antithetical and as such a definite issue cannot be raised. The peeler is however accusing the pastor for attempted murder.
“If the devil wants people to start doubting you, he attacks your reputation”, blared the preacher. Apparently, the long favoured doctrine of discrediting the witness was enunciated by the fallen archangel. Social media chatter that were aroused by this most stimulating occurrence, proved that the bulk of Nigerians do not understand the concept of “innocent until proven guilty”. So far as the law is concerned, both the pastor and the peeler are as innocent as a newborn. It is shop-soiled that our educational system amongst others is pathetic. This may be the cause of bestial comments from citizens who saw fit to school themselves on the use of numerous electronic devices, but never saw as relevant the need to learn basic civic education. Evidently, there are few rational Nigerians. “Pastors in this country are wicked and they should be exposed!”, commented a woman, who was apparently sane. “Only God will punish this prostitute, for accusing a man on God of this calibre… smh” averred another citizen, presumably with an averaged sized brain. The accusations were indeed intense for a man of the preacher’s standards; he was indeed a man of God. Make no mistakes; a man of God is a man and when evidence however bleak, point to incriminate a man, irrespective of the suffix “of God”, he must be investigated.

Variety, they say, is the spice of life. One man’s meat has over time been proven to be another’s poison. Little wonder while some look to the preacher and see a messiah being persecuted, some see only a lingering evil that must be eradicated. Whatever we choose to see, the law is the law: dura lex, sed lex.

We live in a surprising century, you and I. Men have learnt to fly, communicate over extremely long distances and of course, manipulate digital images. Some of these inventions have become so popular, to the extent that they are used as verbs in our day to day conversations. Nevertheless, all hell let loose when incriminating pictures of the clergyman were posted online by the accuser. Photoshop, CorelDraw, Pics Art; there are many explanations to this incriminating evidence. These explanations were unable to prevent persons from thinking the worst the preacher. 

Our assumptions are the windows with which we view the world. Like all windows we must learn to scrub them regularly, or we risk being like the man who constantly vilified his neighbour for being unable to wash his clothes properly, only to discover it was his windows that were filthy. Benjamin Franklin once enthused, “Being ignorant is not so much as a shame as being unwilling to learn”. The accusations brought against the pastor are obviously rebuttable. However, it is not at all impossible that he is guilty. We must remember this, is if we are ever going to be a civilized society.




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