In honour of children’s day, I just wanted to take a moment to remember the craziest parts of our childhood. All the good times before physics, beards, work and life itself began.
Do you remember when we were little and would believe anything, our parents would tell us all kinds of stories to make us behave. My mum always tells me about the time I was wailing because I wanted the peppersoup my dad was having and so she went in and poured meat stock in a plate and gave me to drink. And then there was the very popular ‘if you eat too much of this, it will grow in your stomach and out of your mouth’. That one worked so well on me, after my aunt told me, I stayed away from groundnut for a long time. Even with all the lies our parents told us, they weren’t as bad as the ones we told ourselves and our siblings. It always cracks me up when someone talks about how they deceived their younger siblings into thinking half meat was better than full meat lol.
Then there were the cartoons, as far as I’m concerned, kids nowadays don’t know cartoons. These things they watch now just come with long straws to suck their IQs. The real cartoons were Tom and Jerry, Scooby Doo, Wacky Races and all the rest. I remember rooting for Daphne and Fred’s relationship and how happy I got whenever they showed any Tom and Jerry episode when Tom was ‘in love’, with his pupils turning into hearts and then New Year Tom and Jerry marathons, heaven! Then there were those hilarious dwarfs in Wacky Races .
It was good to not have to worry about anything; back then my biggest problem was that I thought 10 + 10 was 100. Don’t judge me. All it took to impress girls was goody goody and shapes if you were rich. Whatever happened to goody goody anyway and Nice biscuit and that ring sweet? Thank God kidnapping wasn’t rampant then though, because with that ring sweet they could probably have kidnapped my entire class.
I remember I used to want to be an artist, I would imagine that I had painted flowers and the sun in a room. I traced pictures from all those activity books and my siblings would be hailing me like I was Da Vinci. I was so convinced that I was the next best thing in art until I got 3 out of 10 in visual art in JS1, at what point I quickly advised myself and changed career.
Watching movies when I was young, if I even sensed from a mile away that they were about to kiss, I would cover my eyes for like five seconds, that was the deepest it went back then. If there was a sex scene that they covered with blanket that was the end of the movie, to your tent O Israel! That movie would find itself at the bottom of a cupboard somewhere, blue films were things you only heard of in church ‘ Don’t watch blue film or you will go to hell’. No one even says blue film now.
Most of my childhood memories are probably too embarrassing to be shared; I’m sure most of us have the one where we forgotten in school. I remember they didn’t come to pick me and my siblings, I was probably in primary 2 or 3 then, I remember being the one that directed them home though, funny how I was better with directions then than I am now.
And then there was the time I was preparing for common entrance, all that Ugo C. Ugo stress while everyone else was playing and enjoying themselves. According to my parents, I wrote a note saying ‘ mummy and daddy, please I’m tired’. That sounds like something I would do though. Most of the childhood memories are just pictures, like the first time I used a pen and the pen I used; then I remember the seat arrangement of my primary 5 class. I remember the 1st to 6thposition in my primary four class. Weird? Maybe. Share your own funny childhood memories, I’d love to hear them. Happy Belated Children’s day to all our inner children!